What would I do

I love love this song!. Of course Ms. Ingrid Michaelson is the truth!
But I can't get this song on MP3 format, I think she only performed this specially for that audience, because it's not on her albums -__- (ah tragic)

But the song is so catchy, and it speaks the truth. We often complain about lost love, or just complain in general. But in reality how would life be if there was nothing to complain or cry about? I guess it's just the balance of it all. (:

simply amazinggg!


PS- sorry that in the beginning the audience is kinda slow and couldn't get the melody of the song O_O
But I DO NOT own this vid. This is not my footage! Some kind soul on YouTube put it up so i just had to take it real quick (:

There is Fire on the Mountain.

Hey there.
I apologize for taking so long to update this blog of mine. With all that goes on in life it's hard to make time to actually sit and write down the deepest thoughts within.

But I found some time, however, it's going to be hard to fill you in on EVERYTHING that has been going on. But I'll try.

Not too long ago I took a little road trip to Philly to visit my dear husband CMHA! I was accompanied by my homie D, and the newest addition to the crew Ms Lisa Marie. (:
I had a wonderful time out there. It was so great to see Chelz and all my other homies I met at Aquinas. It helped me feel a bit more independent because it was my first road trip without my family or any "adults". My homie Lisa drove the whole way there and back. It kinda motivated me to work on that license of mine, so that next road trip we can just alternate drivers (:
But anyways, there was a point during our weekend in Philly that got a little rocky and we almost left a day early. There was some unresolved tension between two of my good friends, and to be quite honest, even after our little intervention, I don't think the issue was really resolved. More like brushed under the rug simply to avoid further conflict. But I don't know. I hope they find time to truly work it and make sure its 100% good.

But after some tears and tough love, we decided to stay and make the best of it. We headed out to Hooters that night and had a wonderful evening!
Spending that weekend out there with my closest homies made me truly appreciate them. I genuinely enjoy their company and can full be myself and comfortable around them. See I'm the type of person who doesn't really get close to people. Even if we chill for a while, it's hard for me to fully connect, and most of the time I'm extremely nonchalant about things. But being around such a group of amazing girls makes my heart melt. I love each one of them. Even Lisa and Memanda, though I just recently started talking and chillin with them. I just enjoy real and honest people, who are okay just being themselves. No matter what.

So once we got back to NY I was back on my usual school flow and counting down the days till the wonderful and amazing Ingrid Michaelson's concert. I was SOOO excited. I went with my homie D and my boy Jayson, who I hadn't seen in like forever!.
THE SHOW WAS AMAZINGGG! I adore Ingrid because to me she is such a REAL and down to earth performer. She's goofy and entertaining and reminds me of someone I would hang out with on a daily basis. (: And as we stood there watching the show, we just so happened to stand next to the VIP section and ended up conversing with Ally Moss' mother. XD (she's one of Ingrid's background singers and guitarist)
Overall the night was unforgettable, not to mention we were like 10ft away from Ingrid right before she skipped away into her dressing room XD

Overall, life is amazing. I'm enjoying all the positive aspects of it. Although there are some rough patches, nothing compares to the joy and warmth I feel when I'm surrounded by positive and genuine people. I intend on living to the fullest extent and learn to love myself along the way. So far it's going pretty good (:

So tomorrow I will be chillin with my homie Diamond and Lisa, and I think my Bro is rolling with us too, (wish Chelz was here to make it complete =/) but we'll vid chat if anything. Tomorrow will be a chill out day with the crew, and I hope to have a good time XD

Peace and Love!

Our Swords

So I'm trying to squeeze in some blogging time here. While my brother blasts some rock music, Band of Horses- Our Swords to be exact, the song is pretty sweet so I felt it's only right to title this blog that.

Yesterday I wasn't feeling well at all. I went to the gym with my friend Sam, who I recently met in school, and we were exhausted! My whole body was aching, it still is actually. So when I got home my house was a mess, as always, so I called my mom to complain and she hung up on me >=| I HATE when people just hang up on me so I was livid! She doesn't know how to interact with people in a positive way and when I try and talk to her she just shuts me off and says that I'm trying to lecture her. -____- The never ending battle with that woman.

I was annoyed and tired, and I tried and just disregard it and keep on with my day, but she killed the day for me. So I went to sleep at like 8 and didn't wake up till 8 this morning. But now that I'm up I'm still feeling a bit blah -__-
I hate when I feel like this because I ruins everything for me. And it makes me feel weak and unmotivated, I guess it creates this somewhat temporary psychosomatic problem. I'm in a gray spell at the moment

My mind is definitely in a very negative place so everything I think about is just horrible. I'm trying to get it together but it's hard. And I know you're probably thinking like it's not that big a deal, so why am I tripping?!
But it's far deeper than that. It's suppressed emotions that need to come out and be released! It's not only my relationship with my mother thats bothering me. and I wish I could speak in more detail but it's a bit personal. And some things I just wish to not share with the public.



^^ I LOVE his emotions in this song. I guess that the intensity of his words is how I feel right now. Not necessarily what he's saying in his lyrics per say, but just his raw emotions. I want to just yell and blurt out everything thats on my mind.
But I think I'm just in a very weak point in time. So I'm going to cool it and do something to get me in the right track again.

Hopefully I'll be better next time I update.